Unfair! Preposterous! Totally untubular!

I need to put some oil on my [sunburned] shoulders. They don't hurt anymore, but they're unsightly.

How close would you have to be to a supernova to get a lethal dose of neutrinos?

I wonder how many miles my nose has run.

I learned how to fell trees yesterday. (Been reading County Wisdom and Know-How)

I come over here to put the jam on my sandwich, because it splooshes.

(During heatwave): Mama, should we put out a pail of water for the deer?

Unfair! Preposterous! Totally untubular!

Baba reads Botany in a Day at night and I read it in the day.

J: Do you know how the pistal developed?
Mama: No, how?
J: The fertile leaves got curled in and fused together to protect the ovules.
Mama: Ha! I thought you were talking about guns and you were talking about flowers!

Can you sound mean saying "bubbles"?

Can you sound mean saying "bubbles"? Try it. There's no way to make it sound mean.

I'm supposed to come up with a "big question" for my science project. Maybe calculate the velocity of an unladen swallow?

I'm kind of partial to tetrahedrons.

We used to have a bunch of dried fruit around. And now they're gone...like pickles in the wind.

Mama: Don't forget you're grounded today.
Julian: You might think so, but I'm not, really. I'm in the air, not grounded.

Mama: Julian, please stop squealing!
J: My voice is going to change and I won't be able to anymore, so I want to take advantage of it!

(After giving her a hug): Mama, you've suddenly gotten really short.

Mama, please make more plantains. I love them--make six next time. I think they're stretching out my palette.

Mama, if you didn't know the word irrelevant or relevant, what would you think it meant?

Do you know how to pop your eyeballs out? Go too deep.

What-cha-talkin' about? Shitake mushrooms about!

Thumbs up for thumbs.

We're so lucky to have thumbs! I'm trying to make a breakfast without using my thumbs. It's so difficult!

Sometimes I don't like to see pictures in books, because you end up thinking along the lines of "Oh, I've been thinking of it wrong all along".

Baba: Why don't you eat the pizza European-stye?
Julian: I use whatever finger food I can muster.

Do you know how to manufacture a burp?

I figured out the perfect thing to do an a rainy day. Play Legos while listening to an audio book in a fort in your room.

[Julian told Mama a math problem she couldn't answer. He didn't want tell her the answer, insisting she figure it out for herself.] You're trying to double me up, twist me and squeeze the answer out of me, Mama!

I don't know why I have these sudden excitement spikes, do you?

Suzuki: Wait Julian, I don't see "wash dishes" on your chart.
Baba: Yeah, he was supposed to have a "chores" section on there.
Suzuki: Maybe we should call them "duties" instead of "chores". Better connotations.
Julian: If I do "chores", I get money for them.
Baba: Hey, I don't get money for doing chores.
Julian: That's because you don't have "chores", you have "duties", Baba.

I'm throwing rotten tomatoes at you in my mind.

Wow, that's amazing--honey has such powerful surface tension!

Mama, Baba, you both should just surrender. You shouldn't have to have the last say. I know, it's hard for me, too, not to have the last say.

(Later) Suzuki: I like what you said to diffuse the argument earlier, about not having to have the last say.
Julian: You taught me that one time.

Good job, Mama. You said "sorry" for what you did. You did a general good job.

Julian: What's for dinner?
Suzuki: Rice and bean tacos.
J: Don't you guys have anything else up your sleeves? You've been faltering lately.

Mama, remember the time I put a carrot slice in your pants pocket, and you found it like a year later?